We arrived at a rather lavish restaurant, surprising because most people only take half an hour for lunch. “Are we going to have enough time to get seated and eat before we run out of time?” I asked Alison quietly.
She patted me on the head and gave me a look like I was a lost puppy.
“There’s a line and everything.”
“Are you serious?” she whispered softly in my ear. “We are out with the owners of the company. Do you think time matters?”
I brushed my ear and stepped away. Suddenly I didn’t care about how much it costs, how long it took, or if I would ever reduce my inbox load to something manageable. Nothing in my life ever felt this good, standing in a place not caring about what happened next. Happiness, joy—I don’t know what to call it—but I wanted this all the time.
“So, do you like this type of food?” Ms. Cedar asked, snapping me back to reality.
“I’m pretty picky, but I’m sure there’s something I’ll like. They have chicken fingers and fries, right?” I rocked on my heels and rubbed my stomach. “It’s the go-to dish when I’m not sure.”
Mr. Manor wrinkled his nose and put his arm around me. “While you are out with us, I’m sure you’ll be willing to try something new, right?”
“Do you like calamari?” Cedar asked hopefully.
“What’s that?” I looked at Alison. “Do you know?”
Alison leaned close and nudged me. “It’s squid.”
I began to make noises and a face when I realized she was applying pressure to my arm.
“They usually fry it.”
“You simply have to have some,” Cedar insisted.
“It’s thickly breaded like a fish stick, hopefully.” I really hated trying new things especially when I was quite certain it might sicken me later. “If it’s slathered in batter, I might be able to stomach it.”
Manor laughed heartily. “He’s the first person to honestly tell you it sounds horrid.” He looked at me intently. “If it’s done right, it’s barely edible. If it’s done like most places, you’d have an easier time with a rubber chew toy.”
Cedar feigned being hurt then smiled ever so slightly. “I guess you can pass.”
“No.” I stood up tall. “Challenge accepted. What else should I try?”
After some more minutes in line, we were finally seated. I like to have my back to the wall so I can see everyone milling about, but this time, the owners took those seats hastily. My anxiety level rose a little when I picked up the menu and saw that very little was, in my opinion, edible. Every dish had some mystery ingredient that I’ve never heard of or knew I detested. How could I now appear fearless when I knew I was honestly going to hate whatever I picked?
“Do you see something you like?” Ms. Cedar asked, putting down her menu.
Quickly trying to decide, I looked under the sandwiches. “The club sounds delightful.”
Mr. Manor snickered behind his menu. “Not feeling gutsy?”
“I guess I’ll have to keep working on that. My gut tells me to get something small and predictable.” I blew out a cleansing breath. “You’ll have to forgive me, but please don’t give up on me.”
Manor put his menu down and nodded slowly. “There’s plenty of time to get you there. Do you ladies know what you want?”
Alison rattled off some dish I’d never heard of, and I had to peek at the menu. Once again, she was trying to make a positive impression, and it was working.
“Nice choice,” Cedar agreed. “You’ve had that before?”
“My grandmother has made a very wide range of delicacies that I’ve had the pleasure of trying over the years. This particular one caught my eye.” Alison looked at me. “Maybe I can convince her to make some for me to bring into work.”
“That would be wonderful.” Cedar called our waiter over, and we all placed our orders. “So,” she started when we were alone again, “how are you both doing?”
“There’s a lot of jobs I need to catch up on.” I sat back and relaxed. “That’s to be expected though.”
“Have you met everyone yet?” Manor asked.
“I think so.” I looked at Alison. “You’ve talked to everyone, right?”
“I’m sure it’ll take some time to learn all the names.” Alison smiled.
“Well, it’s important that you start building positive relationship with your team. You’ll get to know everyone soon enough.” Ms. Cedar was definitely a people person and made everyone feel comfortable quickly. “What are your thoughts on them so far?”
Alison was taken aback by the question. For the first time, she looked stumped. “Not really sure I can answer that yet.”
Cedar pressed the issue. “Can’t or won’t?”
Alison looked down at the table, and I could tell she was thinking. “Okay,” she said, lifting her head up and pushing her hair behind her shoulders. “I don’t think they will work out.”
Manor looked at me and shrugged. I could see that annoyed Cedar, but she addressed Alison again.
“We were concerned about them. Do you think you’ll be able to help them transition out quickly?”
Alison straightened her spoon and pursed her lips. “Was the former exec a problem too?”
I was getting antsy listening to such high-level discussions being made while I waited for a stack of bread with a toothpick in it. Now I felt very stupid that I tagged along. Manor looked at Cedar and then at me. “CS, do you think this can wait until after lunch?” he asked.
Cedar looked at me. “You understand that all this is strictly confidential, right?”
“I would never tell someone that they were about to be fired,” I said nervously. “That’s just something you don’t do.”
Cedar frowned. “Does this bother you?”
“A company has to do what’s in its best interest. I get that.” I did not want to say anything else, but I could see she wanted more. “It’s over lunch, that’s all.”
“You’d be amazed at what we talk about while on the golf course. That’s where the big moves take place.” Manor laughed loudly, and the tension dissipated. “How about we stick to sports and the weather?”
“I’m just not used to being around people like you two,” I said honestly. “My job experience never extended to more than making sure I showed up on time.”
“Well, sometimes you have to be willing to do whatever it takes, and that’s what separates the execs from the rest,” Ms. Cedar assured me. “Being able to assess someone the moment you meet them is a skill that takes time to master.”
“Did you do that with me?” I asked, not really wanting to know the complete truth.
“Sure did.” Manor pushed his chair back slightly. “Anyone can have the skills to get something done. We want people whom we enjoy being around with while we all get our jobs done.”
I looked at Alison and was glad they hired her because I really wanted to spend all my waking moments with her.
“There are some people we have to turn away simply because they don’t fit in to the company’s culture. There are some people that also stop trying to fit in, and that’s when we have to help them find somewhere else to work.” Cedar said like it was memorized.
Company culture was a concept I really did not understand. The words made sense separately but did not when put together. Something acceptable outside of the building stopped being okay as soon as you crossed the threshold each morning. It’s like unwritten rules that will get you reprimanded as quickly as praised. What it all comes down to was staying liked by those in power. Power did not equate to position. It ebbed and flowed silently and often.
“I promise you,” I began, “that I will be here for as long as you are both willing to keep me. It’s the most I can offer.”
“That attitude”—Ms. Cedar tapped the table—“is what we are looking for every day. The day you don’t feel that way, make sure you come and talk to us.”
I wanted to walk away from this whole experience, but something in me connected with them. Never in my life had I wanted to impress someone or do my best, except when my parents were alive. A deep awakening inside left me needing air. I stood slowly, and everyone looked at me concerned.
“I’m okay,” I lied, feeling flush. “Just need to use the little boy’s room.”
They all relaxed, and I hurried off.
When I went into the bathroom, I sat in the stall and kept checking the lock. I just wanted a job I could show up to, not get all caught up in office politics on day one. Now here I sat sweating and wondering how I could look at the two I knew were going to get fired. Alison made me insane, and she was simply mad as a hatter too. Was this how every day was going to affect me?
I guessed it was time to get myself together and head out to the table. Splashing water on my face shocked me back to my senses. No more cowering in the corner. It was time to let them see I could handle the tough corporate choices that needed to be made, even at lunch. Shortly after I sat down, a series of dishes began arriving at the table.
“Did we order all this?” I asked, looking at more food than four people could possibly ever eat.
Manor started grabbing pieces from different dishes and insisted we all take some too. “Don’t be shy. This is for everyone.” While he said that, it was still difficult to get much while he often hovered his hand over what I wanted while he was talking. “So, Derrick, tell me a little about yourself.”
Such an open-ended question like that always scared me. What I wanted to talk about was rarely what anyone else wanted to hear. “I live in the city with my sister and her two kids.”
Ms. Cedar acted like that was the most amazing thing I could ever say. “Are you close with your family?”
“My sister is the only family left. I moved in with her a bunch of months ago after her husband died.” I didn’t really want to rehash my life’s story, but it was my own fault for bringing up the topic.
“That was such a nice thing to do,” Cedar said. “Is everything going well now?”
“I think so. She knows the person that had my job before me. That’s how I heard about your place.” I took a bite of my sandwich, hoping they would move on from the questions.
“How about you, Alison? Any family?” Cedar asked.
“I have my own place, but I’m still close to my parents and grandparents. My parents moved in with my grandparents to make sure.” She sighed. “You know, so they’d be safe.”
“That’s important,” Manor said, still eating. He was doing a fairly good job of clearing the plates. “Family is very important to all of us.”
We all nodded and took the opportunity to shovel down some food during the lull in conversation.
“I was wondering,” Cedar asked since she was finished chewing first. “Where are you and your family from?”
Alison wiped her mouth with a napkin. “My grandparents were born and raised in Tehran. They came over here at the insistence of my parents a few years after they were married. I was actually born there during an extended vacation.”
“How often do you go back?” I asked. I could tell Alison didn’t want to keep talking about the subject.
“We haven’t gone back,” she said and then took a sip of her water. “This place sure has some good food. It’s almost as good as my grandmother’s cooking,” she said, taking another bite.
“Does your sister do the cooking?” Cedar asked, moving back to me.
“Usually. I really don’t think she would want the kids to live off peanut butter and jelly sandwiches and soda. That’s about the extent of my skills in the kitchen.”
They all laughed.
“My sister always makes the best out of any situation. That’s why, I guess, she’s doing as well as she is on her own.”
Mr. Manor raised his glass. “Here’s to family,” he said, and we all clinked ours together cautiously. “We spend a third of our lives with them, a third away from them, and the rest sleeping. Hopefully, it’s enough for them to know we love them.”
The rest of the time we spent talking about our favorite things, ranging from colors to vacation spots. I will never remember most of the stuff that was said, but I will not forget how great it felt to spend time out with the three of them. I wished all my lunches would be as long and fun, but I knew the reality was this would probably never or seldom ever happen again. My position would only allow me to hang out with a certain group of fellow associates, and I had Alison to thank for this once-in-a-career event.
On the way back, Manor and Cedar walked a few steps behind Alison and me.
“What do you think?” she asked, smiling widely. “That was worth the time, right?”
“I think so. I’ve got a lot of stuff to catch up on, but I’ll be fine.” My head was getting back into business mode.
“Did you tell your boss before you left?” she asked, concerned.
“What do you mean?” I asked, feeling rather nervous. “Do you think I should have?”
She looked at her watch. “We’ve been out for close to two hours. Is he the kind of person that checks up on you all the time?”
I shrugged. “How am I supposed to know that? I just started today.”
She had me thinking the worst, and that was not helping the growing pains in my stomach.